WWE Monday Night RAW Quotes
The superstars of World Wrestling Entertainment's "RAW" brand collide each and every week on WWE Monday Night RAW, broadcast once again each and every week on the USA cable network.
Jerry 'The King' Lawler: She shouldn't even be here right now, she should be in the back with Mr. McMahon, having fun.
JR: How do you know that was fun?
Jerry 'The King' Lawler: What do you mean how would that be fun? You don't think that would be fun?
JR: Well, he's not exactly my type, if you know what I mean...
JR: How do you know that was fun?
Jerry 'The King' Lawler: What do you mean how would that be fun? You don't think that would be fun?
JR: Well, he's not exactly my type, if you know what I mean...
[In a comedy skit, Kane and Daniel Bryan are attending an "Anger Management Group Therapy" session. The group leader asks Kane to "Tell us what makes you angry. Start with your childhood."]
Daniel Bryan: [rubs his eyes] This is a bad idea.
Kane: Well, I grew up locked in a basement, suffering severe psychological and emotional scarring when my brother set my parents on fire. From there, I shifted around among a series of mental institutions until I was grown, at which point, I buried my brother alive... twice. Since then, I've set a couple of people on fire, and abducted various co-workers. Oh, and I, uh... once electrocuted a man's testicles. Years ago, I had a girlfriend named Katie, but, uh... let's just say that that didn't turn out so well. My real father is a guy named Paul Bearer, who I recently trapped in a meat locker. I've been married, divorced, broke up my ex-wife's wedding, and tombstoned the priest. And for reasons never explained, I have an unhealthy obsession with torturing Pete Rose.
Daniel Bryan: [rubs his eyes] This is a bad idea.
Kane: Well, I grew up locked in a basement, suffering severe psychological and emotional scarring when my brother set my parents on fire. From there, I shifted around among a series of mental institutions until I was grown, at which point, I buried my brother alive... twice. Since then, I've set a couple of people on fire, and abducted various co-workers. Oh, and I, uh... once electrocuted a man's testicles. Years ago, I had a girlfriend named Katie, but, uh... let's just say that that didn't turn out so well. My real father is a guy named Paul Bearer, who I recently trapped in a meat locker. I've been married, divorced, broke up my ex-wife's wedding, and tombstoned the priest. And for reasons never explained, I have an unhealthy obsession with torturing Pete Rose.
Vince McMahon: Right now. Uh, the following Public Service Announcement is brought to you by the chairman of World Wrestling Entertainment, Vincent Kennedy McMahon. Kids I have a lesson for you. If you're, a user, you're a loser. Don't wind-up like Shawn Michaels. Don't do drugs. Thank you very much.
Batista: Take this however you want it, but I think that you, would make a great politician.
Eric Bischoff: Thank you Batista!
Batista: You're Welcome.
Eric Bischoff: Hmm. Mayor Bischoff. I like that.
[Batista who just left steps back into frame putting his arm on Eric's shoulder]
Batista: Better yet. Used Car Salesman.
Eric Bischoff: Thank you Batista!
Batista: You're Welcome.
Eric Bischoff: Hmm. Mayor Bischoff. I like that.
[Batista who just left steps back into frame putting his arm on Eric's shoulder]
Batista: Better yet. Used Car Salesman.
