Without a Paddle Quotes
After their friend dies, three men decide to fulfill their childhood promise by going on a camping expedition for the lost D.B. Cooper bounty, with calamitous results.
Del Knox: I spent the best years of my life sittin' on the porch, playin' the harmonica, waitin' for somethin' better. And the years have been goin' by faster, and faster, and then, all of a sudden, I was an old man.
Tom Marshall: Well I bet you can play the shit outta that harmonica!
Del Knox: That I can. 'Cept there's no one around to hear me play it. Piece of advice: you can lose your money. You can spend it - all of it. Maybe work hard, get it all back. But if you waste your time, you're never gonna get it back.
Tom Marshall: Well I bet you can play the shit outta that harmonica!
Del Knox: That I can. 'Cept there's no one around to hear me play it. Piece of advice: you can lose your money. You can spend it - all of it. Maybe work hard, get it all back. But if you waste your time, you're never gonna get it back.
Dan Mott: [doing his best c3p0 voice] We are in serious trouble my friends. All data points to us being... how do you human's say it? Completely screwed.
Dan Mott: yeah. You know, that is... that's a good way to say it. That pretty much sums it up.
Dan Mott: [doing his best c3p0 voice] As expected, Tom is... drunk.
Dan Mott: yeah. You know, that is... that's a good way to say it. That pretty much sums it up.
Dan Mott: [doing his best c3p0 voice] As expected, Tom is... drunk.
Dan Mott: This trip is officially over! This is finished! Let's just go home.
Tom Marshall: I agree. That is a great idea. All we've got to do is jump up over that 100-foot waterfall, swim upstream 20 miles, get the sheriff on the phone... he liked us, I remember. And he'll send out a rescue boat. And... hey, there's a beer in the river. Cool.
Tom Marshall: I agree. That is a great idea. All we've got to do is jump up over that 100-foot waterfall, swim upstream 20 miles, get the sheriff on the phone... he liked us, I remember. And he'll send out a rescue boat. And... hey, there's a beer in the river. Cool.
Dan Mott: [as Flower is lovingly attending to him] I'm very good at giving a back massage... so if you wanna roll down those stockings I could give you one.
Flower: Stockings?
Dan Mott: Uh, leg warmers?
Flower: [shows Dan one of her very hairy legs] I'm all natural.
[Flower giggles]
Dan Mott: Supernatural.
Flower: Stockings?
Dan Mott: Uh, leg warmers?
Flower: [shows Dan one of her very hairy legs] I'm all natural.
[Flower giggles]
Dan Mott: Supernatural.
Jerry Conlaine: But you could've left! Why'd you stay up here all these years?
Del Knox: Seemed like a good idea at the time. Know what I mean, kid?
Jerry Conlaine: Yeah, I do.
Del Knox: Have you ever spent 30 years in a cabin?
Jerry Conlaine: ...No.
Del Knox: Well, then you don't know what I mean!
Jerry Conlaine: I mean, metaphorically, I know what you mean.
Del Knox: Metaphorically, have you ever spent 30 years in a cabin?
Jerry Conlaine: Uh - no.
Del Knox: Well then think before you talk!
Del Knox: Seemed like a good idea at the time. Know what I mean, kid?
Jerry Conlaine: Yeah, I do.
Del Knox: Have you ever spent 30 years in a cabin?
Jerry Conlaine: ...No.
Del Knox: Well, then you don't know what I mean!
Jerry Conlaine: I mean, metaphorically, I know what you mean.
Del Knox: Metaphorically, have you ever spent 30 years in a cabin?
Jerry Conlaine: Uh - no.
Del Knox: Well then think before you talk!
Jerry Conlaine: [laying in the boat, after rapid riding] I about shit. Did you about shit?
Tom Marshall: I about shit.
Dan Mott: I did shit.
Jerry Conlaine: Oh shit!
Dan Mott: What? Oh, shit? Oh, shit! What? Oh, shit?
Dan Mott: [while falling off the waterfall]
[all together shout]
Dan Mott: Oh, shit!
Tom Marshall: I about shit.
Dan Mott: I did shit.
Jerry Conlaine: Oh shit!
Dan Mott: What? Oh, shit? Oh, shit! What? Oh, shit?
Dan Mott: [while falling off the waterfall]
[all together shout]
Dan Mott: Oh, shit!
Jerry Conlaine: Come on, Dan. It's like when we'd jump off the railroad bridge into the river when we were kids. That was... higher than this...
Dan Mott: But I never *did* jump in the river! You guys always pushed me when I wasn't looking!
Jerry Conlaine: Oh yea...
[Jerry pushes Dan off the Treehouse]
Dan Mott: But I never *did* jump in the river! You guys always pushed me when I wasn't looking!
Jerry Conlaine: Oh yea...
[Jerry pushes Dan off the Treehouse]
Jerry Conlaine: So this is Spirit River, we take that to Widowmaker Bend and then we hike to Devil's Staircase and that should lead us right to the top of Hellfire...
Dan Mott: What's with all these satanic names? Isn't there, like, a Fluffy Bunny Way?
Tom Marshall: No... but there's a Shut-Up-You-Big-Baby Ridge.
Dan Mott: What's with all these satanic names? Isn't there, like, a Fluffy Bunny Way?
Tom Marshall: No... but there's a Shut-Up-You-Big-Baby Ridge.
[Denise carries a cardboard box into her house as the answer machine comes on]
Jerry Conlaine: [on the answer machine] Hi, this is Jerry, and I can't come to the phone right now because I am busy trying to convince the love of my life to give me another chance. And I will prove to her that I grew up just enough to know that I want the responsibility day in and day out of being there for her in this relationship which I am hoping will someday become marriage, kids and an *unbelievably* happy life together.
[Denise starts to smile as she hears the message]
Jerry Conlaine: [hangs up] Hi honey.
[Jerry gets down on one knee and proposes to Denise, who accepts his proposal. Jerry stands up and embraces her]
Jerry Conlaine: [on the answer machine] Hi, this is Jerry, and I can't come to the phone right now because I am busy trying to convince the love of my life to give me another chance. And I will prove to her that I grew up just enough to know that I want the responsibility day in and day out of being there for her in this relationship which I am hoping will someday become marriage, kids and an *unbelievably* happy life together.
[Denise starts to smile as she hears the message]
Jerry Conlaine: [hangs up] Hi honey.
[Jerry gets down on one knee and proposes to Denise, who accepts his proposal. Jerry stands up and embraces her]
Jerry Conlaine: How do you guys get supplies?
Flower: When we need supplies, we radio the Earthchild Support Network.
Jerry Conlaine: [encouraged] Radio? You guys have a *radio*?
Butterfly: Yeah. We haven't used it since that last big thunderstorm. Remember that Flower?
Flower: [smiling] Oh my god. That thunderstorm was *so* spiritual. Earthchild's limbs were waving and heaving back and forth like she was dancing to the rhythm of the thunder. It was like, BAM! BAM! BAM! Full on... fanatric... orgasim.
Jerry Conlaine: So where is this radio?
Dan Mott: Fanatric orgasim?
[Butterfly gets up and excitedly holds Flower's hands]
Flower: [excited] We danced naked in the storm all night!
Butterfly: [excited] And then held each other soaking wet until the morning. The rain is like a drug, it just makes you wanna...
Dan Mott: What? Makes you wanna what?
[Butterfly and Flower look at each other and giggle]
Flower: When we need supplies, we radio the Earthchild Support Network.
Jerry Conlaine: [encouraged] Radio? You guys have a *radio*?
Butterfly: Yeah. We haven't used it since that last big thunderstorm. Remember that Flower?
Flower: [smiling] Oh my god. That thunderstorm was *so* spiritual. Earthchild's limbs were waving and heaving back and forth like she was dancing to the rhythm of the thunder. It was like, BAM! BAM! BAM! Full on... fanatric... orgasim.
Jerry Conlaine: So where is this radio?
Dan Mott: Fanatric orgasim?
[Butterfly gets up and excitedly holds Flower's hands]
Flower: [excited] We danced naked in the storm all night!
Butterfly: [excited] And then held each other soaking wet until the morning. The rain is like a drug, it just makes you wanna...
Dan Mott: What? Makes you wanna what?
[Butterfly and Flower look at each other and giggle]
Dan Mott: I wouldn't be so jealous of me if I were you. Every day I develop some new and exciting phobia.
Jerry Conlaine: You're exaggerating again.
Dan Mott: I'm afraid of the dark, Jerry.
Jerry Conlaine: So? There's a lot of people that are afraid of the dark.
Dan Mott: I'm afraid of small spaces.
Jerry Conlaine: Again, not that abnormal.
Dan Mott: Cellophane.
Tom Marshall: Like Saran Wrap?
Jerry Conlaine: Yeah, you're alone on that one.
Dan Mott: I won't even keep it in the house anymore, because I'm afraid that somehow it'll get draped over my head and stick to my mouth and nose and I'll suffocate. How pathetic is that?
Tom Marshall: Very.
Jerry Conlaine: You're exaggerating again.
Dan Mott: I'm afraid of the dark, Jerry.
Jerry Conlaine: So? There's a lot of people that are afraid of the dark.
Dan Mott: I'm afraid of small spaces.
Jerry Conlaine: Again, not that abnormal.
Dan Mott: Cellophane.
Tom Marshall: Like Saran Wrap?
Jerry Conlaine: Yeah, you're alone on that one.
Dan Mott: I won't even keep it in the house anymore, because I'm afraid that somehow it'll get draped over my head and stick to my mouth and nose and I'll suffocate. How pathetic is that?
Tom Marshall: Very.
Flower: My name is Flower.
Butterfly: You may call me Butterfly.
Flower: And if you're from the logging company you'll have to speak to our lawyers!
Tom Marshall: [whispers to Jerry] If you look to your left you can totally see their downstairs.
Jerry Conlaine: [calling] Uh, we're not, we're not from the logging company.
Flower, Butterfly: [smiling and putting two fingers up] Peace!
Jerry Conlaine, Tom Marshall, Dan Mott: H-hey! Peace!
Butterfly: You may call me Butterfly.
Flower: And if you're from the logging company you'll have to speak to our lawyers!
Tom Marshall: [whispers to Jerry] If you look to your left you can totally see their downstairs.
Jerry Conlaine: [calling] Uh, we're not, we're not from the logging company.
Flower, Butterfly: [smiling and putting two fingers up] Peace!
Jerry Conlaine, Tom Marshall, Dan Mott: H-hey! Peace!
Dan Mott: [lying in a bed] So happy right now.
[the camera pans out, revealing Flower lying next to Dan]
Flower: [lovingly] That was really... really beautiful.
[Dan smiles and Flower moves closer and kisses him]
Flower: [lovingly holding Dan] Hmmm will you get the light hon'?
Dan Mott: Oh... yeah.
[Dan turns the light off using his foot]
Flower: [kindly] You're so good at that now.
[Dan giggles]
[the camera pans out, revealing Flower lying next to Dan]
Flower: [lovingly] That was really... really beautiful.
[Dan smiles and Flower moves closer and kisses him]
Flower: [lovingly holding Dan] Hmmm will you get the light hon'?
Dan Mott: Oh... yeah.
[Dan turns the light off using his foot]
Flower: [kindly] You're so good at that now.
[Dan giggles]
