White Christmas Quotes
A successful song-and-dance team become romantically involved with a sister act and team up to save the failing Vermont inn of their former commanding general.
Phil Davis: I want you to get married. I want you to have nine children. And if you only spend five minutes a day with each kid, that's forty-five minutes, and I'd at least have time to go out and get a massage or something.
Bob Wallace: You don't expect me to get serious with the kind of characters you and Rita have been throwing at me, do you?
Phil Davis: Well, there've been some nice girls, too, you know.
Bob Wallace: Oh yeah, yeah. Like that nuclear scientist we just met out in the hall.
Phil Davis: All right, they didn't go to college. They didn't go to Smith.
Bob Wallace: Go to Smith? She couldn't even spell it.
Phil Davis: Oh, that's very funny. Ho, ho, ho. The crooner is now becoming the comic.
Bob Wallace: You don't expect me to get serious with the kind of characters you and Rita have been throwing at me, do you?
Phil Davis: Well, there've been some nice girls, too, you know.
Bob Wallace: Oh yeah, yeah. Like that nuclear scientist we just met out in the hall.
Phil Davis: All right, they didn't go to college. They didn't go to Smith.
Bob Wallace: Go to Smith? She couldn't even spell it.
Phil Davis: Oh, that's very funny. Ho, ho, ho. The crooner is now becoming the comic.
Phil Davis: We like to take care of our friends.
Betty Haynes: We're practically strangers!
Phil Davis: Well... well, we'd like to take care of that, too.
Judy Haynes: But... but you might get yourself in an awful jam. Why should you? I mean, what's in it for you?
Phil Davis: Forty-five minutes all to myself.
Betty Haynes: We're practically strangers!
Phil Davis: Well... well, we'd like to take care of that, too.
Judy Haynes: But... but you might get yourself in an awful jam. Why should you? I mean, what's in it for you?
Phil Davis: Forty-five minutes all to myself.
Judy Haynes: We're booked for the holidays.
Phil Davis: Vermont, huh?
Judy Haynes: Oh, Vermont should be beautiful this time of the year, with all that snow.
Phil Davis: Yeah, you know something?
Judy Haynes: What?
Phil Davis: Vermont should be beautiful this time of the year, all that snow.
Judy Haynes: That's what I just said.
Phil Davis: We seem to be getting a little mixed up.
Judy Haynes: Maybe it's the music.
Phil Davis: Maybe it isn't only the music.
Phil Davis: Vermont, huh?
Judy Haynes: Oh, Vermont should be beautiful this time of the year, with all that snow.
Phil Davis: Yeah, you know something?
Judy Haynes: What?
Phil Davis: Vermont should be beautiful this time of the year, all that snow.
Judy Haynes: That's what I just said.
Phil Davis: We seem to be getting a little mixed up.
Judy Haynes: Maybe it's the music.
Phil Davis: Maybe it isn't only the music.
[General Waverly has told the jeep driver to take the new Commanding General back to Headquarters via "the short cut"]
Joe, Adjutant Captain: [pointing after the departed jeep] That's not the way back to Headquarters!
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: Joe, YOU know that, and I know that, but, uh, the General doesn't know it. At least he won't for about an hour and a half.
Joe, Adjutant Captain: That sergeant will be a private in the morning.
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: [wearily] Yes, isn't he lucky.
Joe, Adjutant Captain: [pointing after the departed jeep] That's not the way back to Headquarters!
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: Joe, YOU know that, and I know that, but, uh, the General doesn't know it. At least he won't for about an hour and a half.
Joe, Adjutant Captain: That sergeant will be a private in the morning.
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: [wearily] Yes, isn't he lucky.
[Susan and the General enter the ballroom to find two rows of soldiers forming a path to the stage]
Bob Wallace: [Steping up to the General and saluting] Troops ready for inspection, sir!
Joe, Adjutant Captain: [at his side] Just routine, sir.
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: ["inspecting the troops" at the inn] I am not satisfied with the conduct of this division. Some of you men are under the impression having been at Anzio entitles you not to wear neckties. Well you're wrong. Neckties will be worn in this area! And look at the rest of your appearance. You're a disgrace to the outfit. You're soft! You're sloppy! You're unruly! You're undisciplined!
[pause]
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: And I never saw anything look so wonderful in my whole life! Thank you all.
Bob Wallace: [Steping up to the General and saluting] Troops ready for inspection, sir!
Joe, Adjutant Captain: [at his side] Just routine, sir.
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: ["inspecting the troops" at the inn] I am not satisfied with the conduct of this division. Some of you men are under the impression having been at Anzio entitles you not to wear neckties. Well you're wrong. Neckties will be worn in this area! And look at the rest of your appearance. You're a disgrace to the outfit. You're soft! You're sloppy! You're unruly! You're undisciplined!
[pause]
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: And I never saw anything look so wonderful in my whole life! Thank you all.
Betty Haynes: Mr. Bones? Mr. Bones? How do you feel, Mr. Bones?
Phil Davis: Rattlin'!
Betty Haynes: Mr. Bones feels rattlin'. Ha ha. That's a good one. Tell a little story, Mr. Bones.
Bob Wallace: A funny little story, Mr. Bones!
Phil Davis: How can you stop an angry dog from biting you on Monday?
Betty Haynes: That joke is old. The answer is to kill the dog on Sunday!
Phil Davis: That's not the way to stop a dog from biting you on Monday!
Betty Haynes: How would you bring the thing about?
Phil Davis: Have the doggy's teeth pulled out!
Betty Haynes: Oh, Mr. Bones, that's terrible!
Phil Davis: Uh-huh.
Betty Haynes, Bob Wallace: Yes, Mr. Bones, that's terrible!
Phil Davis: Uh-huh.
Phil Davis: Rattlin'!
Betty Haynes: Mr. Bones feels rattlin'. Ha ha. That's a good one. Tell a little story, Mr. Bones.
Bob Wallace: A funny little story, Mr. Bones!
Phil Davis: How can you stop an angry dog from biting you on Monday?
Betty Haynes: That joke is old. The answer is to kill the dog on Sunday!
Phil Davis: That's not the way to stop a dog from biting you on Monday!
Betty Haynes: How would you bring the thing about?
Phil Davis: Have the doggy's teeth pulled out!
Betty Haynes: Oh, Mr. Bones, that's terrible!
Phil Davis: Uh-huh.
Betty Haynes, Bob Wallace: Yes, Mr. Bones, that's terrible!
Phil Davis: Uh-huh.
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: Why here?
Bob Wallace: Well, you got this nice big empty ski lodge, and the minute Phil and I saw it, we thought it was ideal, didn't we, Phil?
Phil Davis: Uh, that's right, Bob, ideal. That's exactly the word we used, too - ideal. We looked at this big ski lodge and we said "Isn't it ideal, absolutely, ideal," didn't we?
Bob Wallace: Ideal.
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: We've established the fact the lodge is ideal.
Bob Wallace: Well, you got this nice big empty ski lodge, and the minute Phil and I saw it, we thought it was ideal, didn't we, Phil?
Phil Davis: Uh, that's right, Bob, ideal. That's exactly the word we used, too - ideal. We looked at this big ski lodge and we said "Isn't it ideal, absolutely, ideal," didn't we?
Bob Wallace: Ideal.
Gen. Thomas F. Waverly: We've established the fact the lodge is ideal.
[after Bob has found out about Phil and Judy's phony engagement]
Judy Haynes: Well, ib... ib... ib... It's always that she's been kind of a mother hen.
Phil Davis: Yeah, we wanted the mother hen to leave the roost so that the little chick could... Oh, I guess we laid an egg.
Bob Wallace: An egg? Brother, you laid a Vermont volleyball!
Judy Haynes: Well, ib... ib... ib... It's always that she's been kind of a mother hen.
Phil Davis: Yeah, we wanted the mother hen to leave the roost so that the little chick could... Oh, I guess we laid an egg.
Bob Wallace: An egg? Brother, you laid a Vermont volleyball!
Betty Haynes: Look who's talkin' about guilt!
Bob Wallace: What do you mean by that?
Betty Haynes: I mean you shouldn't mix fairy tales with liverwurst and buttermilk.
Bob Wallace: What d'you have for lunch today?
Betty Haynes: I didn't have lunch.
Bob Wallace: Well, maybe you ought to eat some.
Betty Haynes: Why is everybody suddenly so concerned about my eating habits? Why don't people just leave me alone?
Bob Wallace: What do you mean by that?
Betty Haynes: I mean you shouldn't mix fairy tales with liverwurst and buttermilk.
Bob Wallace: What d'you have for lunch today?
Betty Haynes: I didn't have lunch.
Bob Wallace: Well, maybe you ought to eat some.
Betty Haynes: Why is everybody suddenly so concerned about my eating habits? Why don't people just leave me alone?
