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Ranch hand Pete Perkins looks to fulfill the promise to his recently deceased best friend by burying him in his hometown in Mexico.
Melquiades Estrada: Promise me one thing, Pete. If I die over here, carry me back to my family and bury me in my home town. I don't want to be buried on this side among all the fucking billboards.
[last lines] Mike Norton: You gonna be all right?
[Pete makes a date with two girls and introduces them to Melquiades] Melquiades Estrada: That's the one from the cafe, right? Pete Perkins: Yes, genius. Melquiades Estrada: But she's married! Pete Perkins: So's the other one. Melquiades Estrada: Oh, shit.
Pete Perkins: Thank you! Old Man with Radio: I need to ask you a favor. Pete Perkins: Anything you want. Old Man with Radio: I need you to go ahead and shoot me. My son, he ain't coming back. Pete Perkins: Oh, he'll come back. Old Man with Radio: He said he had cancer. Told me to go into town with him. But I don't want to go. I've lived here all my life. I don't want to offend God by shooting myself. It's a problem, you see. Pete Perkins: We don't want to offend God neither. [Pete and Mike start to leave] Old Man with Radio: You're good people. You need to go ahead and shoot me.
Border Patrolman: How many got away? Mike Norton: Three. Border Patrolman: Well, someone's got to pick strawberries.
Pete Perkins: You need to investigate them border patrols that use a 223. Belmont: You want me to investigate the Kennedy assassination while I'm at it?
Mike Norton: I'm sorry, Melquiades! For taking your life, I'm sorry!
Rachel: Viagra works for Bob. Belmont: I'll turn truck-stop queer and blowjob-giver before I use that shit.
Pete Perkins: You try to run away again, and I'll kill you. I guess you know that by now. Mike Norton: Yes, sir.
Belmont: There's a thousand ways he can go to Mexico, and that sonofabitch is so fuckin' nuts he might be headin' north to Canada.
Mike Norton: [reassuring Lou Ann] You're my red hot mamma...
Mariana: Is there hot coffee? Juan: Yes, fresh made. Mariana: Bring me the pot. [Mariana pours the coffee in Mike's lap, then hits him with the pot] Mariana: Now we're even, asshole.
[Pete is forcing Mike to sleep besides the body of Melquiades Estrada] Mike Norton: Hey! Hey, you! Pete Perkins: My name is Pete. Mike Norton: Well, Pete, the ants are eating your friend.
Pete Perkins: What's Belmont doing? Rachel: He went on vacation. He said that it wasn't his problem, that it was between you and the Border Patrol, and he wanted to go to Sea World.