The Seven Year Itch Quotes
When his family goes away for the summer, a so far faithful husband is tempted by a beautiful neighbor.
The Girl: Your imagination! You think every girl's a dope. You think a girl goes to a party and there's some guy in a fancy striped vest strutting around giving you that I'm-so-handsome-you-can't-resist-me look. From this she's supposed to fall flat on her face. Well, she doesn't fall on her face. But there's another guy in the room, over in the corner. Maybe he's nervous and shy and perspiring a little. First, you look past him. But then you sense that he's gentle and kind and worried. That he'll be tender with you, nice and sweet. That's what's really exciting.
Richard Sherman: If Helen sent you to get a divorce.
Tom MacKenzie: [incredulous] A divorce?
Richard Sherman: [continuing] I absolutely refuse! I'll fight it in every court!
Tom MacKenzie: [incredulous] She sent me for the paddle.
Richard Sherman: [continuing; crazed] Because I can explain everything: the stairs, the cinnamon toast, the blond in the kitchen.
Tom MacKenzie: [interrupts; incredulous] Wait! Wait a minute Dickey-Boy. What blond in the kitchen?
Richard Sherman: [seething with contempt] Oh, wouldn't you like to know! Maybe it's Marilyn Monroe!
Tom MacKenzie: [incredulous] A divorce?
Richard Sherman: [continuing] I absolutely refuse! I'll fight it in every court!
Tom MacKenzie: [incredulous] She sent me for the paddle.
Richard Sherman: [continuing; crazed] Because I can explain everything: the stairs, the cinnamon toast, the blond in the kitchen.
Tom MacKenzie: [interrupts; incredulous] Wait! Wait a minute Dickey-Boy. What blond in the kitchen?
Richard Sherman: [seething with contempt] Oh, wouldn't you like to know! Maybe it's Marilyn Monroe!
The Girl: It's just terrible up there... Ohh, this feels just elegant. I'm just not made for the heat. This is my first summer in New York and it's practically killing me. You know what I tried yesterday? I tried to sleep in the bathtub. Just lying there up to my neck in cold water... But there was something wrong with the faucet. It kept dripping. It was keeping me awake, so you know what I did? I pushed my big toe up the faucet... The only thing was, my toe got stuck and I couldn't get it back out again... No, but thank goodness there was a phone in the bathroom, so I was able to call the plumber... He was very nice, even though it was Sunday, I explained the situation to him and he rushed right over... But it was sort of embarrassing... Honestly, I almost died. There I was with a perfectly strange plumber and no polish on my toenails.
The Girl: I posed for this picture and when it was published in U.S. Camera, they got all upset... It was one of these 'artistic' pictures... it was on the beach with some driftwood. It got Honorable Mention... It was called Textures, because you could see three different kinds of texture: the driftwood, the sand and me. I got $25 dollars an hour, and it took hours and hours. You'd be surprised.
Elaine: [From Here To Eternity spoof, Elaine and Richard on the beach] What is this strange animal thing you have? lt bothers me. lt's bothered me since the first time l saw you. And it'll bother me always, from here to eternity.
Richard Sherman: You must fight it, Elaine. Remember, l belong to another!
Elaine: Richard!
Richard Sherman: [Running off into the surf] This can never be. l have a devoted, trusting wife at home, and a freckle-faced little space cadet.
Elaine: Richard!
Richard Sherman: You must fight it, Elaine. Remember, l belong to another!
Elaine: Richard!
Richard Sherman: [Running off into the surf] This can never be. l have a devoted, trusting wife at home, and a freckle-faced little space cadet.
Elaine: Richard!
Richard Sherman: Tell me doctor, are you very expensive?
Dr. Brubaker: Very!
Richard Sherman: I'm sure you occasionally make exceptions.
Dr. Brubaker: Never!
Richard Sherman: Well I mean, once in a while, a case must come along that really interests you.
Dr. Brubaker: At fifty dollars an hour, all my cases interest me.
Dr. Brubaker: Very!
Richard Sherman: I'm sure you occasionally make exceptions.
Dr. Brubaker: Never!
Richard Sherman: Well I mean, once in a while, a case must come along that really interests you.
Dr. Brubaker: At fifty dollars an hour, all my cases interest me.
Richard Sherman: I know girls like this! They just can't keep their big mouths shut! This is gonna be all over New York... she's probably telling someone about it right now... yaddida yaddida yaddida...
[cuts to The Girl gossiping about their crazy night]
Richard Sherman: ... I knew it! I knew it! Big blabbermouth!
[cuts to The Girl gossiping about their crazy night]
Richard Sherman: ... I knew it! I knew it! Big blabbermouth!
Richard Sherman: Miss, may I have the check, please?
Waitress at Vegetarian Restaurant: Oh, yes, sir. Now let's see... we had the number seven special, a soybean hamburger with french-fried soybeans... Soybean sherbet and peppermint tea.
Richard Sherman: Don't forget I had a cocktail to start.
Waitress at Vegetarian Restaurant: Oh yes, we had the sauerkraut juice on the rocks, didn't we? You will be proud to know that your entire meal with the cocktail was only 260 calories.
Richard Sherman: I am proud.
Waitress at Vegetarian Restaurant: Oh, yes, sir. Now let's see... we had the number seven special, a soybean hamburger with french-fried soybeans... Soybean sherbet and peppermint tea.
Richard Sherman: Don't forget I had a cocktail to start.
Waitress at Vegetarian Restaurant: Oh yes, we had the sauerkraut juice on the rocks, didn't we? You will be proud to know that your entire meal with the cocktail was only 260 calories.
Richard Sherman: I am proud.
