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Two Navy men are ordered to bring a young offender to prison but decide to show him one last good time along the way.
[a woman hears Meadows chanting and invites him to a party] Meadows: Drop your socks and grab your cocks, we're going to a party. Buddusky: If this kid gets pussy out of this, I'll eat my fucking flat hat, man.
Buddusky: He don't stand a chance in Portsmouth, you know. You know that, don't you? Goddamn grunts, kickin' the shit outta him for eight years... he don't stand a chance. Mulhall: I don't want to hear about it. Buddusky: 'Maggot' this, 'maggot' that... Marines are really assholes, you know that? It takes a certain kind of a sadistic temperament to be a Marine.
Mulhall: You're shittin' me! M.A.A.: I would never shit you. You're my favorite turd!
Meadows: [looking at porn] Are they really doing that when they take that picture? Buddusky: [pause] Well kid, there's more things in this life than you can possibly imagine. I knew a whore once in Wilmington. She had a glass eye... used to take it out and wink people off for a dollar.
Budduskey: I am the motherfucking shore patrol, motherfucker! I am the motherfucking shore patrol! Give this man a beer. Meadows: I don't want a beer. Budduskey: You're gonna have a fuckin' beer!
Nichiren Shoshu Leader: Welcome to a Nichiren Shoshu discussion meeting! Tonight throughout the city there are actually - there are hundreds of meetings like this going on, where people are learning about Nam-myoho-renge-kyo and Gohonzon! Meadows: [to Budduskey] What's a "gohonzon"? Buddusky: Shhh. I'll tell ya 'bout it later.
Meadows: If you're Catholic, do you think it's, uh, sacrilegious to chant? Buddusky: Did it get you laid? Meadows: No. Buddusky: Then Meadows, what the fuck do you want to go on chanting for? Mulhall: Chant your ass off, kid. But any pussy you get in this world, you gonna have to pay for, one way or another. Buddusky: Hallelujah!
[Meadows has just prematurely ejaculated] Buddusky: You wanna try it again, kid? Meadows: Yeah. Buddusky: [to prostitute] Okay, honey. Mulhall: Don't worry about it, kid... plenty more where that came from. Buddusky: We got all night, kid.
Buddusky: Take it easy, Meadows, you're makin' Mulhouse hungry.
Mulhall: I hate this detail. I hate this fucking chickenshit detail!
Nichiren Shoshu Member: But now I, well, I really love the clarinet and I can't even remember why I wanted the flute in the first place.
Mulhall: Tell you what, mister citizen bartender. You can take your beers and shove 'em up your ass sideways. Can you dig it?
Meadows: [with a mouthful of peanuts] I had 'em with me!
Mulhall: When you're in the Navy, shitbird, and you're in transit, nobody knows where the fuck ya are. Now go tell that MAA to fuck himself; I ain't goin' on no shit detail!
Young Whore: Jesus Christ! That's what I call quick.
Mulhall: I consider myself in jeopardy with you man, understand? In jeopardy. This ain't no farewell party n' he ain't retirin'. Understand? He's a prisoner n' we're takin' 'im to the jailhouse. N' you have a tendency to forget that. You're a menace, man. You ain't no simple shit Bad-Ass, you're a motherfuckin' menace. But from now on, MAA can go piss up a rope! You ain't no honcho! N' I wanna hear no more of this horseshit psychology jive! No more turnin' that boy's head around to prove what a fuckin' big man you are! You're a lifer like me! Navy's the best thing ever happened to me, n' I don't want'cha to fuck me up, y'understand?
Buddusky: [Budduskey's response to a woman's sarcastic remark about his navy uniform] You know what I like most about this uniform? The way it makes your dick look.
Buddusky: Boy, they really stuck it to ya, didn't they, kid! Stick it in and break it off. Up your giggy with a wah-wah brush, stick it in an' break it off.
Buddusky: Welcome to the wonderful world of pussy, kid.
Buddusky: [listening to Nichiren Shoshu members singing a happy song] Buddusky: Why does all of this make me feel so fucking bad?
Mulhall: Are you shittin' me?
Buddusky: Could ya melt the cheese on there for the Chief?
Meadows: After... after... well maybe it was an act for her. I mean I know she was a whore. But I think she liked me. Buddusky: They got feelings just like everybody else, kid; she probably did. Meadows: Well, it was real for me. That's what counts.
Mulhall: We'd better catch that train. Buddusky: We still got time for a beer. Mulhall: Now wait a minute, man... Meadows: I ain't old enough. Buddusky: Ain't old enough for what? Meadows: For a beer. Buddusky: Everybody's old enough for a beer. Ain't that right, Mule? Mulhall: Yeah.
Marine: I call Karate. Mulhall: And I call you a motherfucker!
Marine O.D.: [in bathroom at bus station] Sailor looks like he's lost something. Marine: Probably has trouble finding it with those thirteen buttons. Buddusky: If I was a Marine, I wouldn't have to fuck with no thirteen buttons. I'd just take my hat off.
Buddusky: Y'know, kid... you got a helluva knack for killin' a conversation.
Mulhall: [At the very end, watching Meadows ice skate in an empty park] He sure is havin' a good time. Buddusky: And you said he didn't have it in him!
Buddusky: Heineken? Why it's the finest beer in the world! President Kennedy used to drink it!
Meadows: Hey, you guys mind if I say somethin'? That guy at the bar, why did you get so mad at him? I don't blame him not givin' me a beer. Buddusky: Hey, don't you never get mad at nobody? Meadows: Well, sure I do, yeah. Mulhall: Who do you get mad at? Meadows: Not at somebody who's doing their job. Buddusky: Who, then? Meadows: Injustice. Buddusky: Bullshit! You never get mad at nobody. You're just a pussy! Meadows: I do too get mad. Mulhall: Did you ever get mad at the old man for what he done to you? Meadows: Well, he was just... Buddusky: ...doin' his job. Hey, they're gonna take eight years outta your life, man. Meadows: Six years. You said six! Buddusky: Hey, what the fuck difference does it make? You don't even care about it. Mulhall: Come on, Badass, that don't help him. Buddusky: Fuck help, fuck fair! Fuck injustice! Don't you ever just wanna fuckin' whomp and stomp on someone, bite off their ear, just to do it...? I mean just to do it, just to get it out of your system?
Buddusky: One time... when I was... Oh Jesus Christ...! A friend of mine was looking for me... and I was up on top of his car and I pissed on his head... just being crazy, you know what I mean? Mulhall: Don't you get crazy with me!
Buddusky: He looks like a goddamn big penguin, don't he?
Mulhall: You ever been married? Buddusky: Not so you'd notice.
Mulhall: Leave the kid alone...
Buddusky: [after about a case of beer] I would like to drink a toast to Batman... Shuperman... and the Human Torch. AH-HA-HA!