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After a young man's premonition of a deadly race-car crash helps saves the lives of his peers, Death sets out to collect those who evaded their end.
Mechanic's Girlfriend: Have you all lost your fucking mind? [gets head knocked off by a flying tire]
Hunt Wynorski: That's a lot of Tampons for one woman.
Hunt Wynorski: We just lost a really hot MILF.
Lori: Janet, come on! We have to leave right now. Janet: No. No, I can't keep doing this, okay? You're both nuts. Lori: Janet, we gotta go. Come on. Janet: No. Don't you see? This is where I was supposed to be in the first place, not that stupid race. I was meant to see this movie.
Lori: I have my cowboy right here. Janet: Get a room, guys.
Janet: Yes. I own you, machine.
Samantha Lane: I've got my eye on you two.
Theatre Manager: Find the way to the exit. Remain calm. Everything's gonna be okay. [theater explodes blowing him away]
Hunt Wynorski: [about Janet] What's with that? She went from uptight but normal to uptight and totally insane. Nick: Why do you gotta be a prick? She saw somebody die. Hunt Wynorski: So did we. Nick: Yeah, and we're all freaked out. Would it kill you to be sensitive? Hunt Wynorski: I don't know. I've never tried it. [Hunt begins to leave] Lori: Where are you going? Hunt Wynorski: If you're right about this whole crash thing, then I'm going to make the most of every moment I have left. So I'm gonna do what I do best: I'm gonna get laid. If I'm dying, I'm trying. Keep up the good fight, guys. And if I happen to bump into Janet, I will check on her. Lori: Thanks.
Hunt Wynorski: [kisses his lucky coin and then points it to Janet] Go ahead, Janet. Kiss it. Janet: [flashes a disgusted look at Hunt] Hunt Wynorski: It's your choice, heads or tails, but you know I like head.
Nick: There's gonna be a huge crash. Hunt Wynorski: Of course there's a crash. There's always a fucking crash.
Hunt Wynorski: [playing with his iPhone after having sex with a woman] I finished, like, four minutes ago. Ever played "Donkey Punch"?
George Lanter: I've been trying to kill myself all day.
Pit Crewmember: Go! Go! Go! [Car 45 drives away, with a screwdriver still attached] Pit Crewmember: No, I meant "Wait"!