The Critic

The Critic Quotes

Jay Sherman is a New York film critic who has to review films he doesn't like for a living.

Theater Employee: Excuse me sir, the show is over.
Jay Sherman: But I have nowhere to go...
[End Credits]
Usher: Excuse me, sir. The show's over.
Jay Sherman: Is the snack bar still open?
Jay Sherman: [finishing a movie review] ... and that's why Goldie Hawn should be shot!
Franklin: I have a new girlfriend for you, son. Her name is Barbie and she lives in Mali-boo. She already has a boyfriend named Ken, but he's not much of a man,
[whispering]
Franklin: ... I checked.
Theater Employee: Excuse me, sir. The movie's over.
Jay Sherman: I'm stuck in the chair!
[repeated line]
Jay Sherman: It stinks!
[repeated line]
Jay Sherman: Hotchie Motchie!
Dressmaker: We dressmakers have a very strict code, so I need to know. Do you deserve to wear virginial white? Because if you don't, you'll have to wear an off white, what we call a "hussy white". So which will it be? White white?
Margo Sherman: Yes... um, except for the gloves.
Theater Clerk: Excuse me, the show's over.
Alice Tompkins: Get away, pipsqueak!
Jay Sherman: That's why I love her!
Jay Sherman: Celebrity voices are impersonated. No celebrities were harmed in the filming of this episode.
Alice Thompkins: Listen to your heart.
Jay Sherman: Everybody always says that.
Jay's Stomach: Nobody ever listens to me!
Jay Sherman: [Driving a truck] I've got to keep driving, I can't stop for anything!
Roadside Farmer: Meet Ingmar Bergman, 25 cents!
Jay Sherman: [Disappointed] Oh...
[Keeps on driving]
Roadside Farmer: [to Bergman] Well, you'd best get back to the strawberry patch with Polanski and Bertolucci.

Popular TV Shows view all

Game of Thrones Breaking Bad The Wire Sherlock Rick and Morty Ash vs Evil Dead True Detective The Sopranos Leyla ile Mecnun Last Week Tonight with John Oliver Avatar: The Last Airbender Narcos