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Two friends and business partners find their lives turned upside down when strange circumstances lead to them being placed in the care of 7-year-old twins.
Zach: I think "scat" is poop. Dan: Really, son? Zach: Yeah. Charlie: You wiped poop on my face? Dan: Yeah. Scat happens, man.
[from trailer] Dan: If I'm gonna be an old dad, you're gonna be Uncle Charlie. We can do this. Charlie: We?
Charlie: The kids have never seen Friday the 13th, part 1 or 2! Vicki: Oh, my God! Dan: He's kidding. He's a kidder. He was scared of The Wizard of Oz. He's kidding. The monkeys got him nuts.
Charlie: You crying, man? Jimmy Lunchbox: [holding back tears] I ain't cryin'!
[from trailer] [reading fine print from one of Dan's prescription bottles] Charlie: Watch out for sudden loss of depth perception?