New York Stories

New York Stories Quotes

A middle-aged artist obsessed with his pretty young assistant, a precocious 12 year old living in a hotel, and a neurotic lawyer with a possessive mother make up three Gotham tales.

Sheldon: [Looking around Trva's dank, gloomy apartment] You got a nice place here. What time does the cobra come out?
Mother: What are you, an astronaut?
Sheldon: [Opening lines of segment] I'm 50 years old. I'm a partner in a big law firm. You know I'm very successful, and I still haven't resolved my relationship with my mother.
Lionel Dobie: You don't know how deep I go, or how down I get! I was married four times before you were born!
Paulette: [to Lionel] Sometimes I feel like a human sacrifice!
Paulette: [Seeing a patrol car with two policemen in it] Kiss the driver on the mouth. Then we'll talk.
Lionel Dobie: [Disbelieving the request and laughing nervously] What?
Paulette: Come on, and show me how much you love me.
Lionel Dobie: [Shaken and laughing nervously. After a pause] What if I do? Huh?
Paulette: Then I'll know your love is true, and if you don't, your name is King Bullshit, and I pack.
Lionel Dobie: [When Paulette sees Lionel appearing unexpectedly in Paulette's bedroom] I just wanted to kiss your foot. Sorry, nothing personal.
Paulette: I don't have to sleep with you anymore?
Lionel Dobie: I'm your ally against horse dung and fraud. That's as far as it goes from now on.
Zoe: How's everything?
Claudio: Well, in life there are always a few problems... but things are not so bad.
Zoe: [to her mother about her Joan Crawford-styled dress] A woman shouldn't have bigger shoulders than a man.
Lionel Dobie: It's art. You give it up, you were never an artist in the first place.
Lionel Dobie: I have to pick up my sister at the airport. I don't know why she can't take a cab like everybody else.
Zoe: [Last lines of the segment] So, you could say we all lived on tour happily ever after.

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