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A graduate history student is unwittingly caught in the middle of an international conspiracy involving stolen diamonds, an exiled Nazi war criminal, and a rogue government agent.
Christian Szell: Is it safe?... Is it safe? Babe: You're talking to me? Christian Szell: Is it safe? Babe: Is what safe? Christian Szell: Is it safe? Babe: I don't know what you mean. I can't tell you something's safe or not, unless I know specifically what you're talking about. Christian Szell: Is it safe? Babe: Tell me what the "it" refers to. Christian Szell: Is it safe? Babe: Yes, it's safe, it's very safe, it's so safe you wouldn't believe it. Christian Szell: Is it safe? Babe: No. It's not safe, it's... very dangerous, be careful.
Christian Szell: Well, what are you going to do now, shoot me? Babe: No, I don't think so. Christian Szell: [referring to the diamonds] Then you're going to take these from me? If I could say a word about that... Babe: No, you can keep them. You can keep as many as you can swallow.
Babe: Listen, I want you to rob my apartment. Melendez: [laughs] Why? Babe: There are some guys out there after me, I got a gun in my desk drawer, and I want you to get me some clothes. Melendez: What's in there for me, man? Babe: I got a TV set, I got a hi-fi, you can take it all. Do it. Melendez: What's the catch? Babe: The catch is it's dangerous. Please do it. Melendez: That ain't the catch. It's the fun.
Babe: [holding up Szell outside the bank] It isn't safe.
[addressing his class] Professor Biesenthal: Well, you four have the dubious honor of having been picked from over two hundred applicants for this seminar. Well, let me just say this. There's a shortage of natural resources. There's a shortage of breathable air, there's even a shortage of adequate claret. But there is no shortage of historians. We grind you out like link sausages. That's called progress. Manufacturing doctorates is called progress. Well, I say, "Let us hush this cry of progress until ten thousand years have passed." That's a quote. Who said that? Come on, who said that? Well, somebody must know the answer. [none of the students answer, but Babe Levy writes "Tennyson"] Professor Biesenthal: Tennyson! Alfred, Lord Tennyson. My God, but you can't compete on a doctoral level and not know "Locksley Hall" and "Locksley Hall 60 Years Later"! I hope you all flunk. Dismissed.
Christian Szell: [to Babe] I envy you your school days. Enjoy them fully. It's the last time in your life no one expects anything of you.
[Szell prepares to torture Babe a second time] Christian Szell: Oh, please don't worry. I'm not going into that cavity. That nerve's already dying. A live, freshly-cut nerve is infinitely more sensitive. So I'll just drill into a healthy tooth until I reach the pulp. Unless, of course, you can tell me that it's safe.
Janeway: My name's Peter Janeway. But you can call me Janey, all of my friends do. Babe: I'm not your friend.
Christian Szell: [to Babe] You're weak. Your father was weak in his way, your brother in his, now you in yours. You are all so predictable.
Janeway: [tantrums] Shit! [Janeway arrives back at Szell's hideout where Karl and Erhard are waiting; Janeway is revealed as a double agent, which horrifies Babe even more] Babe: [screams to Janeway] I saw you kill them! You killed them! You killed them! You killed them! You fucking killed them! You killed my brother!
Christian Szell: I was in a state of hysteria, you know. [referring to the open suitcase filled with diamonds] Christian Szell: Don't you want to take a closer look than that? Babe: No! Christian Szell: You see, uh, in a sense, one becomes more emotional with age. First after a lifetime of being taken by friends and enemies alike, and then just when you think you have your possessions sure, your health begins to go. [laughs] Christian Szell: That is, of course, the ultimate theft!
[When Elsa leaves the library, Babe hesitates, and then runs after her. He finds her as she is climbing the stairs to her apartment and makes small talk, trying to prolong the conversation. When she keeps walking away, he bursts into an honest confession] Babe: Look, I'm sorry I stole your book. Elsa Opel: What? Babe: I took your book and put it underneath mine. I, I didn't know how to talk to you, I was embarrassed, so I took your book. Elsa Opel: Aren't you embarrassed now? Babe: Yeah. I'm, I'm humiliated. Elsa Opel: So, why do you pursue people who sit at your library table? Babe: I don't. It's just that... you're pretty. Elsa Opel: Ohh! [She smiles and turns to walk away from him for about the seventh time] Babe: Well, I can't talk about how smart you are; I don't even know you. Anyway, I'm done lying with you. Elsa Opel: Are you always so incompetent with women? Babe: Oh, yes. Today's way above average for me. Elsa Opel: Congratulations. [She is still smiling as she unlocks her door to leave him] Elsa Opel: Good night. Babe: That's too bad. I could make you so happy. I'm smart as a whip; you won't meet another thief like me in the library again. Come on; why don't you say you'll see me, huh? Elsa Opel: All right. I'll see you again. But it won't come to anything. Babe: You can't tell. Elsa Opel: [wistfully] Yes, I can. [She shuts her door in his face]
[the salesman tries to sell a diamond to Szell] Jewelry Salesman: Tell you what, I know an independent appraiser upstairs, and if he doesn't swear that I'm practically giving this thing away... well, I guess I'll have to find myself a new brother-in-law.
Christian Szell: The gun had blanks, the knife, a retractable blade. Hardly original, but effective enough. I think you'll agree. I'm told you are a graduate student. Brilliant, yes? You are an historian, and I am part of history. I should have thought you would have found me interesting. Frankly, I am disappointed in your silence. Babe: Why do you have so little accent? Christian Szell: I had alexia as a child. Alexia is a disease... Babe: I know. It's where you can't understand written speech. Christian Szell: Highest marks. At any event, my writing is childish still, but I'm a fanatic about spoken language. I envy you your school days. Enjoy them fully. It's that last time in your life no one expects anything of you.
[Szell begins to torture Babe by using a dental probe and a mouth mirror to check for cavities] Babe: [the probe hits a cavity] Ow. Christian Szell: That hurt? Babe: Uh-huh. Christian Szell: I know. I should think it would. You should take better care of your teeth. You have a... [hits the cavity again] Christian Szell: quite a cavity here. Is it safe? Babe: Look, I told you I can't... [Szell stabs the probe into the nerve; screaming in pain] Babe: AAH-HA! AAH! Aah! [Babe's painful screams and moans continues] Karl: You thinks he knows? Erhard: Of course he knows! He's being very stubborn. Babe: [Moaning in pain] Ohh, wait. Please. Please, don't. No. No. Christian Szell: It's okay. Babe: Huh? [Szell then opens a small bottle of oil of cloves, in which he applies it in Babe's badly aggravated cavity to kill the pain] Christian Szell: Isn't that remarkable? Simple oil of cloves, and how amazing the results. Life can be that simple: [holds up the oil] Christian Szell: Relief... [and the probe tool] Christian Szell: Discomfort. Now which of these I next apply? That decision is in your hands. So... take your time... and tell me... is it safe? Babe: Please, stop. Please, stop. Please.
Janeway: [Referring to his dead brother] What did he do? Babe: He was in the oil business. Janeway: Wrong. I know exactly how Doc made his living, and the closest he ever came to the oil business was when he filled up at the friendly neighborhood gas station.
[toasting each other with a glass of Beaujolais] Doc: Cheers. Babe: Up yours.
Doc: [In a fancy restaurant] How could you forget to wear a tie? Babe: I didn't forget it. Who wears a tie when they eat lunch? Doc: [to Elsa] Well, at least his fly is buttoned!
Janeway: [In the car with Babe] All right, things are starting to come together. Keep your head down before you get it blown off. Those two guys I just wasted work for a man named Christian Szell. Does that name mean anything to you? Babe: No. Janeway: He ran the experimental camp at Auchswitz, where they called him "The White Angel" - "The Weisse Engel" - because he has this incredible head of white hair. He's probably the wealthiest and most wanted Nazi left alive. And he's hiding out somewhere in Uruguay. In 1945, Szell let it be known around Auchswitz that he could provide escape for any Jew who was willing to pay the price. He started out with gold naturally, but very quickly worked his way up to diamonds. Have you heard any of this before? Babe: No. Janeway: Szell saw the end early. And he snuck his brother into America with his diamonds. They're right here in New York in a safe deposit box. Szell's brother had the key. The only other key was kept by Szell in Uruguay. And now, if he has to come out of hiding to use it, he's gonna expose himself to incredible risk. Well, everything worked out fine until his brother got killed in a head-on collision with an oil truck. Babe: [raspy] Why did you say "naturally" when you said he'd started with gold? Janeway: Because he knocked it out of the Jews' teeth before he burned them. Szell was a dentist. [Janeway's car makes a left turn at another street] Babe: He's not coming to America, Mr. Janeway. He's here. Janeway: He can't be here. We'd already know it if he was. Babe: He's here. That was the dentist that almost killed me. He kept saying, "Is it safe?, is it safe?" over and over. Janeway: Did he had white hair? Keep your head down! Did he had white hair? Babe: He was bald. Janeway: Bald? The son-of-a-bitch has shaved his head! He's here! And he's panicked! Babe: Why is he after me? Janeway: Because your brother was one of the couriers that transported the diamonds to Paris. And obviously, Szell thinks Doc said something to you before he died. Now did he say anything to you? Babe: What do you mean my brother? You're saying my brother worked for Szell? Janeway: [shouts] No! He worked for us! Everything we do cuts both ways. Szell ratted on all of his buddies. He kept track on all of the old Nazis throughout the world. Whenever we want to bring one of them in, we went to Szell. Now listen, Babe. You gotta do one thing for me, just one thing. Babe: Name it. What? Janeway: Quit protecting Doc! Babe: I'm not. Janeway: He kept himself alive long enough to tell you something. Now what did he say to you? Babe: He didn't say anything. Janeway: He must've said something. Tell me what he said! Babe: [screams] Nothing!
Doc: [to Babe] Do you ever clean this armpit of a place? How can you live like this?
Janeway: Szell's brother's been killed in Manhattan. An accident with an oil truck. Doc: Oh, boy. Any changes? Janeway: Only everything. Doc: They're getting all the couriers.
Janeway: I don't think he knows anything. And I think he knows too much. Christian Szell: You can afford to think what you wish. I can't.
[after Szell tortures Babe by drilling into a healthy tooth, he still gets no information about Babe's brother, frustrating Szell] Christian Szell: [shouts] Erhardt! [Erhardt steps into the dental room] Christian Szell: He knew nothing. If he had known, he would have told. Get rid of him! Janeway: I don't think you've heard the news. [Szell steps into Janeway's office] Christian Szell: What is that? Janeway: You're leaving tomorrow on the 1:00 flight. Christian Szell: You are a very confident young man. Janeway: It's all a front. Just think of me as any other young executive on the come. [Janeway sees Karl and Erhardt dragging a badly tortured Babe] Janeway: You're uncontrollable. What you offer us is valuable, but it's not worth the chaos you're causing. Christian Szell: And if I am unable to conclude my business by 1:00? Janeway: Well, you'll just have to manage that, won't you? As far as we're concerned, Mr. Szell, you're a relic, and you're on your way. Christian Szell: Thus far, I find you rather detestable. May I say that without hurting your feelings? Janeway: Praise from Caesar. I'm just doing my job. I believe in my country. Christian Szell: So did we all.
Janeway: All right, you guys! Let's go! Move out of there! Melendez: Blow it out your ass, motherfucker!
Janeway: Listen, why don't we begin with what happened tonight, hmm? Perhaps you could... you know, give me some of the details. Babe: I was here, Doc... died, you came. Janeway: That's it? Babe: I'm a demon for details.
Old Lady on 47th Street: [recognizing Szell across 47th Street] I known that man. It can't be him. Szell?... Szell!... Szell!