Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman Quotes
In addition to fighting evil, Superman has a burning romance with Lois Lane in both his identities.
Lois Lane: [Lois has witnessed a murder and has been receiving threats] I do not need a bodyguard and even if I did, and I mean this in the nicest possible way, you would not be my first choice.
[walks away]
Clark Kent: [smiles to himself realizing who her first choice would be] Thank you. I take that as a compliment.
[walks away]
Clark Kent: [smiles to himself realizing who her first choice would be] Thank you. I take that as a compliment.
Lois Lane: It's the not first time I've bent the law for a story, but I did feel bad because, after I finished rationalizing it, I realized that a big part of why I did it is because I don't like you.
Mayson Drake: Really? Oh, god, that is such a relief. I don't like you either.
Lois Lane: Really?
Mayson Drake: Really.
Lois Lane: Well, that makes me feel so much better. I couldn't stand the idea that I was just jealous because of Clark. It's so...
Mayson Drake: Petty. I know. I mean it feels so much better just to...
Lois Lane: To just dislike you because... you're you.
Mayson Drake: Really? Oh, god, that is such a relief. I don't like you either.
Lois Lane: Really?
Mayson Drake: Really.
Lois Lane: Well, that makes me feel so much better. I couldn't stand the idea that I was just jealous because of Clark. It's so...
Mayson Drake: Petty. I know. I mean it feels so much better just to...
Lois Lane: To just dislike you because... you're you.
Lois Lane: So, how did I rate as a date?
Clark Kent: Oh, A-plus.
Lois Lane: I hung on your arm decoratively.
Clark Kent: You did.
Lois Lane: Fawned appropriately.
Clark Kent: Absolutely.
Lois Lane: And just faded into the background during your big moment.
Clark Kent: You were beautiful, yet invisible.
Lois Lane: Mmm, make me go through another night like that, and I'll rip out your spleen.
Clark Kent: Oh, A-plus.
Lois Lane: I hung on your arm decoratively.
Clark Kent: You did.
Lois Lane: Fawned appropriately.
Clark Kent: Absolutely.
Lois Lane: And just faded into the background during your big moment.
Clark Kent: You were beautiful, yet invisible.
Lois Lane: Mmm, make me go through another night like that, and I'll rip out your spleen.
Lois Lane: And let's get something straight, I did not work my buns off to become an investigative reporter for the Daily Planet just to baby-sit some hack from Nowheresville! And another thing, you are not working with me, you are working for me. I call the shots, I ask the questions. You are low man - I am top banana and that's the way I like it, comprende?
Clark Kent: You like to be on top. Got it.
Lois Lane: Don't push me Kent, you are way out of your league.
Clark Kent: You like to be on top. Got it.
Lois Lane: Don't push me Kent, you are way out of your league.
Lois Lane: He doesn't love you, Elise. You can tell when a man loves you by the way he treats you, by the way he looks at you, by the way...
Elise Carr: Look, Ms. Lane, if you've found the perfect man, then I'm happy for you.
Lois Lane: No, he's about as far from perfect as you get, but I'll tell you the difference between him and Calvin. I know that he wants my happiness more than his own.
Elise Carr: Look, Ms. Lane, if you've found the perfect man, then I'm happy for you.
Lois Lane: No, he's about as far from perfect as you get, but I'll tell you the difference between him and Calvin. I know that he wants my happiness more than his own.
Victor: If you don't mind my saying so, I think you have great legs. I think I read somewhere that intelligent men are leg-men. Only boobs are interested in, well, you know. Anyway, I think you have very shapely legs. They're like two perfectly-formed carrots.
Lois Lane: [sarcastically] Stop. You're embarrassing me.
[later... after kicking the bad guy]
Lois Lane: You're right, Victor, I do have great legs.
Lois Lane: [sarcastically] Stop. You're embarrassing me.
[later... after kicking the bad guy]
Lois Lane: You're right, Victor, I do have great legs.
Lois Lane: I just want one man. One whole man. Is that too much to ask for? And what do I have to chose from? I have one guy whose really wonderful, only he disappears every time I try and talk to him. And one guy whose really exciting to be with, only he won't talk to me about his work. What are people supposed to talk about if they won't talk about what they did all day? And one guy who is out of this world- - - literally.
Dr. Friskin: I thought you'd given up the Superman fantasy?
Lois Lane: My head has but you know, my heart is just... conflicted.
Dr. Friskin: I thought you'd given up the Superman fantasy?
Lois Lane: My head has but you know, my heart is just... conflicted.
Clark Kent: Well go ahead, I'm waiting.
Lois Lane: For what?
Clark Kent: The morality play, the "you should have trusted me and my infallible reporter's instinct' lecture.
Lois Lane: Clark, you don't need me to remind you of your shortcomings. I would've thought by now they'd be obvious. C'mon, I'm starving and you're buying. And just in case you did miss the moral to the story, thank you, you should trust what's in people's hearts, not just the facts.
Lois Lane: For what?
Clark Kent: The morality play, the "you should have trusted me and my infallible reporter's instinct' lecture.
Lois Lane: Clark, you don't need me to remind you of your shortcomings. I would've thought by now they'd be obvious. C'mon, I'm starving and you're buying. And just in case you did miss the moral to the story, thank you, you should trust what's in people's hearts, not just the facts.
Lois Lane: Well, I think we've finally found the absolute bottom of Metropolis.
Clark Kent: Why is it that the guys who call in with tips always live in the worst part of town?
Lois Lane: What do you think the brochure on this place would say? Exquisite alley view, complimentary roaches on your pillow?
Clark Kent: Why is it that the guys who call in with tips always live in the worst part of town?
Lois Lane: What do you think the brochure on this place would say? Exquisite alley view, complimentary roaches on your pillow?
Clark Kent: You were trying to say something and I... I...
Lois Lane: Had a sudden urge to return a tape. It's perfectly understandable. I needed to express a deep personal feeling. You had to save three dollars.
Clark Kent: Lois. You know, I really hope that someday you learn that sometimes what it seems like people are doing isn't really what they're doing.
Lois Lane: What are you, a fortune cookie?
Lois Lane: Had a sudden urge to return a tape. It's perfectly understandable. I needed to express a deep personal feeling. You had to save three dollars.
Clark Kent: Lois. You know, I really hope that someday you learn that sometimes what it seems like people are doing isn't really what they're doing.
Lois Lane: What are you, a fortune cookie?
Clark Kent: Why wouldn't the Chief want us to tell Jimmy that he said that?
Lois Lane: It's one of those father/son things.
Clark Kent: Oh, really?
Lois Lane: Sure, it's classic. Men are uncomfortable expressing their emotions directly. It's just like the father/daughter thing, only, when you finally do talk, you use more sports metaphors.
Clark Kent: Ha, that's ridiculous.
[Perry sticks his head out of his office]
Perry White: Clark, if Jimmy calls, tell him I know it feels like the bottom of the ninth with two outs and two strikes against him but that the Planet is gonna mount a full-court press, and we won't stop until it's game, set, match, Olsen.
Lois Lane: It's one of those father/son things.
Clark Kent: Oh, really?
Lois Lane: Sure, it's classic. Men are uncomfortable expressing their emotions directly. It's just like the father/daughter thing, only, when you finally do talk, you use more sports metaphors.
Clark Kent: Ha, that's ridiculous.
[Perry sticks his head out of his office]
Perry White: Clark, if Jimmy calls, tell him I know it feels like the bottom of the ninth with two outs and two strikes against him but that the Planet is gonna mount a full-court press, and we won't stop until it's game, set, match, Olsen.
[Clark tries to apologize after he just ran out on Lois. So she starts to mock him]
Lois Lane: No, don't say a word. Allow me. "Lois, I can explain. I suddenly remembered that I had to get my mother's sister's poodle's hair cut, and so you can see why I had to leave you in the middle of our date with your thumb in your ear. But I'm sure you'll understand."
Lois Lane: No, don't say a word. Allow me. "Lois, I can explain. I suddenly remembered that I had to get my mother's sister's poodle's hair cut, and so you can see why I had to leave you in the middle of our date with your thumb in your ear. But I'm sure you'll understand."
Clark Kent: The point is you are the same reporter you have always been. Hard-working. Dedicated. Maybe a little over the top sometimes. You could use some more vacations. Maybe a semblance of a life...
Lois Lane: Is this leading anywhere?
Clark Kent: Lois, you are the best reporter in the city. You always have been and you always will be.
Lois Lane: Is this leading anywhere?
Clark Kent: Lois, you are the best reporter in the city. You always have been and you always will be.
[talking about Lois and Clark's first date]
Bobby Bigmouth: So you two excited?
Clark Kent: Bobby, we didn't come here to talk about...
Bobby Bigmouth: I want you to know how happy I am for you and that there are a lot of people out there that are really pulling for this to work out.
Lois Lane: What people?
Bobby Bigmouth: What, you think it's a big secret that Clark here has been mooning over you?
Clark Kent: Well, I wouldn't say mooning exactly.
Bobby Bigmouth: So you two excited?
Clark Kent: Bobby, we didn't come here to talk about...
Bobby Bigmouth: I want you to know how happy I am for you and that there are a lot of people out there that are really pulling for this to work out.
Lois Lane: What people?
Bobby Bigmouth: What, you think it's a big secret that Clark here has been mooning over you?
Clark Kent: Well, I wouldn't say mooning exactly.
Lois Lane: So basically what you're saying is, all my life I've attracted men that are controlling, incomplete, or downright liars because... because...
Dr. Friskin: Keep going.
Lois Lane: Because that's how I want to be treated? But if I want that kind of man, and I get that kind of man, why am I not happy?
Dr. Friskin: You like chocolate, right?
Lois Lane: How come everybody knows that?
Dr. Friskin: But you know it's not good for you, and the older and wiser we get, the less tolerance we have for something that's not good for us. You're not a victim, Lois, so stop acting like one. You know who you want to be with, you've known all along. The problem is, he's just as scared as you are. So, who's going to be the first to step up and say the scary words?
Lois Lane: How come you don't ask the simple questions?
Dr. Friskin: I would... if I knew the easy answers.
Dr. Friskin: Keep going.
Lois Lane: Because that's how I want to be treated? But if I want that kind of man, and I get that kind of man, why am I not happy?
Dr. Friskin: You like chocolate, right?
Lois Lane: How come everybody knows that?
Dr. Friskin: But you know it's not good for you, and the older and wiser we get, the less tolerance we have for something that's not good for us. You're not a victim, Lois, so stop acting like one. You know who you want to be with, you've known all along. The problem is, he's just as scared as you are. So, who's going to be the first to step up and say the scary words?
Lois Lane: How come you don't ask the simple questions?
Dr. Friskin: I would... if I knew the easy answers.
Frank James: Jesse, it happens to every man once in a while.
Jesse James: Not to me.
Frank James: Look, it's not your fault. His was just plain bigger.
Jesse James: Size never made no difference before.
Frank James: You gotta get your mind off this, Jesse, or it could affect your future performance.
Jesse James: Not to me.
Frank James: Look, it's not your fault. His was just plain bigger.
Jesse James: Size never made no difference before.
Frank James: You gotta get your mind off this, Jesse, or it could affect your future performance.
Superman: Lois, if anyone knows what it's like to be on the outside, I do. Sometimes I feel like I'm out there fighting all alone. Sometimes I feel like giving up. But, then I remember that what I stand for is more important than anything else. Your work is important to the people of Metropolis. You're a brilliant, passionate journalist. Adversity has never stopped you before. Don't let it start now.
Lois Lane: That's funny. Clark said the same thing.
Superman: I'm not surprised. Clark is a very smart guy.
Lois Lane: That's funny. Clark said the same thing.
Superman: I'm not surprised. Clark is a very smart guy.
Lois Lane: I know our relationship has always been difficult to define, but, when I thought about how much I missed you, how much I was going to miss you for the rest of my life, well, I started to think, maybe there's more to our relationship than just friendship.
[seeing him asleep]
Lois Lane: Or, maybe not.
[seeing him asleep]
Lois Lane: Or, maybe not.
Lois Lane: I still can't believe you came barreling in here like some 500-pound gorilla! If you really thought we were in trouble, why didn't you bring the police?
Clark Kent: Look...
Lois Lane: Don't tell me, I already know! You're like every other man in Metropolis! You've got this testosterone surplus that says, "I can do it myself"!
Clark Kent: Lois, I've somehow managed to...
Lois Lane: Mess everything up? No kidding!
Clark Kent: Look...
Lois Lane: Don't tell me, I already know! You're like every other man in Metropolis! You've got this testosterone surplus that says, "I can do it myself"!
Clark Kent: Lois, I've somehow managed to...
Lois Lane: Mess everything up? No kidding!
