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When they find a frozen cave-man in their back yard, two high-school outcasts thaw him and introduce him to modern life while he in turn gets them to actually enjoy life.
Raji: No weezing the ju-uice!
[repeated line] Stoney: Bud-dy!
Stoney: If you're edged 'cause I'm weazin all your grindage, just chill. 'Cause if I had the whole brady bunch thing happenin' at my pad, I'd go grind over there, so dont tax my gig so hard-core cruster.
[repeated line] Stoney: Meat group!
Stoney: Um, Robyn Sweeney, bro? She's not going to the prom with you, man. I wish she would, but she's really not. Dave: What are you talking about? Robyn Sweeney is mine. She's become a major babe, and she loves me. Stoney: She finds you crusty, Dave. Dave: I'll convince her! She'll see the truth. Stoney: The truth is bro, life's about greasing the 'do back, buddy, and wheezin' on the buff-fest, man. High school was interesting, alright? It was kinda like a harsh ride. Ah, ah... Stoney: [howls twice] Stoney: We're going on to bigger and better things, buddy! Dave: Stoney, I am on to bigger and better things!
Link: Weeze the juice!
Stoney: Look, Dave, you're gonna have to just mellow out, bro, on this whole Robyn thing, she always shines you. Dave: You don't understand; we have history. Stoney: Hey, you had history: pre-freshman history. Could've had her back then, man. Dave: She hadn't hit babehood yet!
Link: Betty nugs.
Matt Wilson: Robyn wouldn't piss on your gums if your teeth were on fire.
Dave: The only thing you ever cared about Stoney was nugs, chillin' and grindage.
Dave, and Stoney: [after Link enters the Drivers seat of the Student Driver Car] Oh God, Rad Mobile!
Dave: Stop! Stop, where did you go? You just took off after school. Do you know how worried I've been? Stoney: God, Dave, you sound like my Mom. Dave: God, you can't do that to me. [looking more closely at Link] Dave: What's on his Nose? Stoney: Ya know what, Dave, just Chill, 'cause you know why? Link and I had a Stoney time at the Mountain. Dave: You took him to Mega Mountain? Are you crazy? Stoney: Yeah, 'cause they're ridin' The Vapor in reverse. Dave: They are? Stoney: Unh-huh! Dave: Oh, cool! Link: Check out Fresh Nugs, wheezin' the juice... Stoney, Link: [howling together] Oooooooowwwwww! Bud-dy!
Stoney: [a car horn is heard] Your parents! Dave: My parents! Link: AHH!
Dave: Matt Wilson? I mean, what a jerk! What does she see in him, anyway? Stoney: Well, he's got the buff spikes chillin' on top of his melon, obviously, right?, - dude, he's checking her cheeks! oh oh! - he's got the serious beak, and his own personal holding company full of fundage, bro, that he weases off of ma... ma... Dave: [finishing the phrase] ... jor. Stoney: 18-inch bi's - mine are only 4... Dave: ...besides that. Stoney: He walks like this, right?. [struts in a manly fashion] Stoney: Just like this, right? The nugs fully loose.
Dave: He melted... Stoney: Dave, it wasn't meant to happen. Come on, I'll go buy you some Ho-Ho's.
Stoney: Far too much responsibility for me, anyways, I'm already popular! Dave: Yeah, you travel in large groups of one, Stoney.