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As Hercule Poirot enjoys a luxurious cruise down the Nile, a newlywed heiress is found murdered on board. Can Poirot identify the killer before the ship reaches the end of its journey?
Mrs. Van Schuyler: [Remarking on Linnet's pearls] Oh, they're beautiful! Linnet Ridgeway: Thank you. Mrs. Van Schuyler: And extraordinary, if you know how they're made. A tiny piece of grit finds it's way into an oyster, which then becomes a pearl of great price, hanging 'round the neck, of a pretty girl like you. Linnet Ridgeway: I never thought of it that way. Mrs. Van Schuyler: Well, you should. the oyster nearly dies!
Andrew Pennington: What the hell is going on? Hercule Poirot: We're going through your private papers, sir, isn't that obvious?
Jacqueline De Bellefort: Simon was mine and he loved me, then *she* came along and... sometimes, I just want to put this gun right against her head, and ever so gently, pull the trigger. When I hear that sound more and more... Hercule Poirot: I know how you feel. We all feel like that at times. However, I must warn you, mademoiselle: Do not allow evil into your heart, it will make a home there. Jacqueline De Bellefort: If love can't live there, evil will do just as well. Hercule Poirot: How sad, mademoiselle.
Hercule Poirot: [pointing the Manager of the Karnak towards the bathroom] There is a dead cobra over there. Please do me the kindness of having it removed.
Col. Johnny Race: What are you thinking? Hercule Poirot: I was thinking of Molière: 'La grande ambition des femmes est d'inspirer l'amour'. Col. Johnny Race: [sighs] I wish you'd speak some *known* language... Hercule Poirot: "The great ambition of women is to inspire love."
Mrs. Van Schuyler: You perfectly foul French upstart! Hercule Poirot: Belgian upstart, please, madame.
Manager Of The Karnak: We have found it! We have found it! Oh goody goody! Oh goody goody gumdrops! This certainly takes the camel's hump, oh yes, and no mistake.
Mrs. Van Schuyler: How would a little trip down the Nile suit you? Miss Bowers: There is nothing I would dislike more. There are two things in the world I can't abide: it's heat and heathens. Mrs. Van Schuyler: Good. Then we'll go. Bowers, pack.
Mrs. Van Schuyler: Shut up, Bowers. Just because you've got a grudge against her, or rather her father, no need to be uncivil. Miss Bowers: *Grudge*? Melhuish Ridgeway ruined my family! Mrs. Van Schuyler: Well, you should be grateful. If he hadn't, you would have missed out on the pleasure of working for me. Miss Bowers: I could kill her on that score alone!
Mrs. Van Schuyler: Rules are made to be broken. At least *mine* are by *me*.
Miss Bowers: It's more than likely, it has been my experience that men are least attracted to women who treat them well.
Jim Ferguson: You damn froggy eavesdropper. Hercule Poirot: Belgian! Belgian eavesdropper!
[repeated line] Mrs. Van Schuyler: Temper, temper, Bowers!
Mrs. Van Schuyler: You need a nice cool holiday, I was thinking of a trip along the Gobi Desert!
Mrs. Van Schuyler: Come, Bowers, it's time to go, this place is beginning to resemble a mortuary. Miss Bowers: Thank God you'll be in one yourself before too long you bloody old fossil!
Hercule Poirot: Mon Dieu, j'ai faim. Col. Johnny Race: [whispers] Poirot! You have a woman? Hercule Poirot: Not femme, faim! I am... peckish.
Manager Of The Karnak: [Upon discovering cobra] Oh! Never have I seen such a reptile in a first class cabin!
Jacqueline De Bellefort: [singing a line from the song "Frankie and Johnny" to Simon Doyle] He was her man, but he was doin' her wrong!
Mrs Otterbourne: Frenchmen aren't afraid of good strong sex!
Col. Johnny Race: Why doesn't someone murder her! Hercule Poirot: Well maybe the world's lending libraries will band together and hire an assassin!