Closer Quotes
The relationships of two couples become complicated and deceitful when the man from one couple meets the woman of the other.
Anna: We do everything that people who have sex do!
Larry: Do you enjoy sucking him off?
Anna: Yes!
Larry: You like his cock?
Anna: I love it!
Larry: You like him coming in your face?
Anna: Yes!
Larry: What does it taste like?
Anna: It tastes like you but sweeter!
Larry: That's the spirit. Thank you. Thank you for your honesty. Now fuck off and die, you fucked up slag.
Larry: Do you enjoy sucking him off?
Anna: Yes!
Larry: You like his cock?
Anna: I love it!
Larry: You like him coming in your face?
Anna: Yes!
Larry: What does it taste like?
Anna: It tastes like you but sweeter!
Larry: That's the spirit. Thank you. Thank you for your honesty. Now fuck off and die, you fucked up slag.
Dan: I want Anna back.
Larry: She's made her choice.
Dan: I owe you an apology. I fell in love with her. My intention was not to make you suffer.
Larry: So where's the apology? Ya cunt.
Dan: I apologize. If you love her you'll let her go so she can be happy.
Larry: She doesn't want to be happy.
Dan: Everybody wants to be happy.
Larry: Depressives don't. They want to be unhappy to confirm they're depressed. If they were happy they couldn't be depressed anymore. They'd have to go out into the world and live. Which can be depressing.
Larry: She's made her choice.
Dan: I owe you an apology. I fell in love with her. My intention was not to make you suffer.
Larry: So where's the apology? Ya cunt.
Dan: I apologize. If you love her you'll let her go so she can be happy.
Larry: She doesn't want to be happy.
Dan: Everybody wants to be happy.
Larry: Depressives don't. They want to be unhappy to confirm they're depressed. If they were happy they couldn't be depressed anymore. They'd have to go out into the world and live. Which can be depressing.
Larry: [on a photography exhibit] What do you think?
Alice: It's a lie. It's a bunch of sad strangers photographed beautifully, and... all the glittering assholes who appreciate art say it's beautiful 'cause that's what they wanna see. But the people in the photos are sad, and alone... But the pictures make the world seem beautiful, so... the exhibition is reassuring which makes it a lie, and everyone loves a big fat lie.
Larry: I'm the big fat liar's boyfriend.
Alice: Bastard!
Alice: It's a lie. It's a bunch of sad strangers photographed beautifully, and... all the glittering assholes who appreciate art say it's beautiful 'cause that's what they wanna see. But the people in the photos are sad, and alone... But the pictures make the world seem beautiful, so... the exhibition is reassuring which makes it a lie, and everyone loves a big fat lie.
Larry: I'm the big fat liar's boyfriend.
Alice: Bastard!
Larry: I want you to tell me your name. Please.
[throws down a note]
Alice: Thank you. My name is Jane.
Larry: Your real name.
[throws down another note]
Alice: Thank you. My real name is Jane.
Larry: Careful.
[throws down another note]
Alice: Thank you. Still Jane.
Larry: I've about got another 500 quid here. Why don't I just give you all this money, and you tell me what your real name is, Alice.
[throws down the rest of his money]
Alice: I promise.
[picks up some of the money]
Alice: Thank you. My real name... is plain... Jane Jones.
[throws down a note]
Alice: Thank you. My name is Jane.
Larry: Your real name.
[throws down another note]
Alice: Thank you. My real name is Jane.
Larry: Careful.
[throws down another note]
Alice: Thank you. Still Jane.
Larry: I've about got another 500 quid here. Why don't I just give you all this money, and you tell me what your real name is, Alice.
[throws down the rest of his money]
Alice: I promise.
[picks up some of the money]
Alice: Thank you. My real name... is plain... Jane Jones.
Larry: Is he a good fuck?
Anna: Don't do this.
Larry: Just answer the question! Is he good?
Anna: Yes.
Larry: Better than me?
Anna: Different.
Larry: Better?
Anna: Gentler.
Larry: What does that mean?
Anna: You know what it means.
Larry: Tell me!
Anna: No.
Larry: I treat you like a whore?
Anna: Sometimes.
Larry: Why would that be?
Anna: Don't do this.
Larry: Just answer the question! Is he good?
Anna: Yes.
Larry: Better than me?
Anna: Different.
Larry: Better?
Anna: Gentler.
Larry: What does that mean?
Anna: You know what it means.
Larry: Tell me!
Anna: No.
Larry: I treat you like a whore?
Anna: Sometimes.
Larry: Why would that be?
Dan: Why did you fuck him?
Alice: I wanted to.
Dan: Why?
Alice: I desired him.
Dan: Why?
Alice: You weren't there!
Dan: Why him?
Alice: He asked me nicely.
Dan: You're a liar.
Alice: So?
Dan: Who are you?
Alice: I'm no one!
[Alice spits in Dan's face. Dan raises his hand to slap her]
Alice: Go on, hit me. It's what you want. come on, hit me, fucker!
[Dan slaps Alice]
Alice: I wanted to.
Dan: Why?
Alice: I desired him.
Dan: Why?
Alice: You weren't there!
Dan: Why him?
Alice: He asked me nicely.
Dan: You're a liar.
Alice: So?
Dan: Who are you?
Alice: I'm no one!
[Alice spits in Dan's face. Dan raises his hand to slap her]
Alice: Go on, hit me. It's what you want. come on, hit me, fucker!
[Dan slaps Alice]
Alice: So this man comes into the café today, and he says, "Hey waitress, what are you waiting for?"
Dan: Funny guy.
Alice: So I go, "I'm waiting for a man to come in here and fuck me sideways with a beautiful line like that."
Dan: So what did he ask for?
Alice: He asked for a cup of tea with two sugars.
Dan: Funny guy.
Alice: So I go, "I'm waiting for a man to come in here and fuck me sideways with a beautiful line like that."
Dan: So what did he ask for?
Alice: He asked for a cup of tea with two sugars.
Larry: What would happen if I touched you now?
Alice: I would call security.
Larry: And what would they do?
Alice: They would ask you to leave and ask you not to come back.
Larry: And if I refused to leave?
Alice: They would remove you. Those are security cameras in the ceiling.
Larry: I think it's best I don't attempt to touch you. I'd like to touch you. Later.
Alice: I would call security.
Larry: And what would they do?
Alice: They would ask you to leave and ask you not to come back.
Larry: And if I refused to leave?
Alice: They would remove you. Those are security cameras in the ceiling.
Larry: I think it's best I don't attempt to touch you. I'd like to touch you. Later.
Dan: At six, we stand round the computer and look at the next day's page, make final changes, add a few euphemisms for our own amusement.
Alice: Such as?
Dan: "He was a convivial fellow" - meaning he was an alcoholic. "He valued his privacy" - gay. "He enjoyed his privacy" - raging queen.
Alice: What would my euphemism be?
Dan: She was... disarming.
Alice: That's not a euphemism.
Dan: Yes, it is.
Alice: Such as?
Dan: "He was a convivial fellow" - meaning he was an alcoholic. "He valued his privacy" - gay. "He enjoyed his privacy" - raging queen.
Alice: What would my euphemism be?
Dan: She was... disarming.
Alice: That's not a euphemism.
Dan: Yes, it is.
Alice: You all done?
Dan: Mmm.
Alice: How's the photographer?
Dan: Good. Professional. Rigorous. Thievy. One of your lot.
Alice: What, female?
Dan: Americano.
[They start up the stairs]
Dan: Come on.
[They walk into a room]
Dan: Anna, Alice.
Anna: Hi.
Alice: Sorry to interrupt.
Anna: No, we've just finished. Would you like some tea?
Alice: No, thanks. I've been serving it all day. Can I use your loo?
Anna: Sure. Just through there.
[Alice walks off]
Anna: She is beautiful.
Dan: I've got to see you.
Anna: No.
Dan: What is this, patriotism?
Dan: Mmm.
Alice: How's the photographer?
Dan: Good. Professional. Rigorous. Thievy. One of your lot.
Alice: What, female?
Dan: Americano.
[They start up the stairs]
Dan: Come on.
[They walk into a room]
Dan: Anna, Alice.
Anna: Hi.
Alice: Sorry to interrupt.
Anna: No, we've just finished. Would you like some tea?
Alice: No, thanks. I've been serving it all day. Can I use your loo?
Anna: Sure. Just through there.
[Alice walks off]
Anna: She is beautiful.
Dan: I've got to see you.
Anna: No.
Dan: What is this, patriotism?
