Chopper Quotes
Chopper tells the intense story of Mark "Chopper" Read, a legendary criminal who wrote his autobiography while serving a jail sentence in prison. His book, "From the Inside", upon which the film is based, was a best-seller.
Chopper: Look, all I can tell you is what I've already told Mister Beasley: none of us saw anything. It was just one of those things: Bluey Barnes was reading a magazine; Ambrose Hatcheson was taking a piss; Johnny Price was washing his hands; Jimmy Loughnan was watching a bullant crawl across the table, and I was watching Jimmy watching the bullant.
Detective Downie: [about Neville] So you took him to the hospital?
Chopper: No, I didn't take him to the bloody hospital. Now tell me this, right? Why would I shoot a bloke - BANG - and then put him in the bloody car and whiz him off to the hospital at a hundred miles an hour? It defeats the purpose of having shot him in the first place. What's more, it's bloody insulting, it's bloody insulting. I mean, am I the only bloody standover man in the country who provides a medical plan for some of these characters?
Chopper: No, I didn't take him to the bloody hospital. Now tell me this, right? Why would I shoot a bloke - BANG - and then put him in the bloody car and whiz him off to the hospital at a hundred miles an hour? It defeats the purpose of having shot him in the first place. What's more, it's bloody insulting, it's bloody insulting. I mean, am I the only bloody standover man in the country who provides a medical plan for some of these characters?
Interviewer: You've written a best-seller...
Chopper: Yeah, I know - and I can't even bloody spell. What about those poor bloody academics, those college graduates, battling their guts out to write some airy-fairy piece of exaggerated artwork? And here's a bloke, sitting in a cell, who can't spell, and he's written a best-seller. It's sold two hundred and fifty thousand copies. And it's still selling. And he's writing another one. And I can't even spell. I'm semi-bloody-illiterate.
Chopper: Yeah, I know - and I can't even bloody spell. What about those poor bloody academics, those college graduates, battling their guts out to write some airy-fairy piece of exaggerated artwork? And here's a bloke, sitting in a cell, who can't spell, and he's written a best-seller. It's sold two hundred and fifty thousand copies. And it's still selling. And he's writing another one. And I can't even spell. I'm semi-bloody-illiterate.
Chopper: [to Downie] I've never, I don't think I've ever been as bloody insulted as I am right now. I'm sittin' here confessing to a fucking murder, I've known you since I was a fucking pup, right? And you've got the fucking audacity to drag this cunt here...
Detective Cooney: [Chuckles] Sort out your boy, will you?
Chopper: ...And you look at me like I'm a fucking idiot!
Detective Cooney: [Chuckles] Sort out your boy, will you?
Chopper: ...And you look at me like I'm a fucking idiot!
Chopper: Look, you're not still angry at me about the leg, are you?
Neville Bartos: Nah, forget about it.
Chopper: Because I don't know if you remember, Neville, but I had that bloody shotgun pointed at your head. I reconsidered and dropped it down to your kneecap. Remember?
Neville Bartos: Forget about it. All right?
Chopper: I mean, what the bloody hell were you doing getting lippy at me with a bloody shotgun? I had a bloody loaded shotgun.
Neville Bartos: The leg is okay, all right?
Neville Bartos: Nah, forget about it.
Chopper: Because I don't know if you remember, Neville, but I had that bloody shotgun pointed at your head. I reconsidered and dropped it down to your kneecap. Remember?
Neville Bartos: Forget about it. All right?
Chopper: I mean, what the bloody hell were you doing getting lippy at me with a bloody shotgun? I had a bloody loaded shotgun.
Neville Bartos: The leg is okay, all right?
Detective Cooney: We know you didn't shoot the Turk.
Chopper: I just told you I shot the Turk.
Detective Downie: They've picked up the bloke that did it.
Chopper: What fucking bloke that did it? *I* did it.
Detective Downie: No, Homicide have picked up the guy, right? They've even got the murder weapon.
Chopper: What murder weapon?
Detective Cooney: .410 shotgun.
Chopper: [Pulls out his shotgun] Here. This bloody .410 shotgun.
Detective Downie: Put it away, Mark. Just put the bloody thing away. This thing's a .410. Fine, it's a .410. There's a fucking million .410s out there. That's not the .410 that did it.
Chopper: [incredulous] You don't want this? It's a fucking murder weapon!
Chopper: I just told you I shot the Turk.
Detective Downie: They've picked up the bloke that did it.
Chopper: What fucking bloke that did it? *I* did it.
Detective Downie: No, Homicide have picked up the guy, right? They've even got the murder weapon.
Chopper: What murder weapon?
Detective Cooney: .410 shotgun.
Chopper: [Pulls out his shotgun] Here. This bloody .410 shotgun.
Detective Downie: Put it away, Mark. Just put the bloody thing away. This thing's a .410. Fine, it's a .410. There's a fucking million .410s out there. That's not the .410 that did it.
Chopper: [incredulous] You don't want this? It's a fucking murder weapon!
Mandy: Jimmy and the boys are bringing the car. You help set up the big fellow, it'll make you a star.
Sammy the Turk: They said they had it farmed out, they had it ghosted. But when I walked out the door, they just left me posted.
Jimmy Loughnan: The gun was for real, it was not a lark. But the twit took him out to the wrong car park.
Chopper: Silly boys, that's all that Chopper had to say, and poor little Sammy got blown away.
Sammy the Turk: They said they had it farmed out, they had it ghosted. But when I walked out the door, they just left me posted.
Jimmy Loughnan: The gun was for real, it was not a lark. But the twit took him out to the wrong car park.
Chopper: Silly boys, that's all that Chopper had to say, and poor little Sammy got blown away.
