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You're a hero one day, you're a villain another day. They say that's football. When a manager does well, they're applauded, when they don't do well, they get the sack. Football is a tough world. Those who watch enjoy it - for everybody else, there are a lot of challenges.
The brain knows the real secret of seduction, more effective than even music and martinis. Just keep whispering, 'Gee, you are really special' to that sack of water and protein that is a body, and you can get it to do practically anything.
Actually, the Department of Transport were at one stage going to sack me.
I like to win, I like to compete and I like to sack the quarterback. I imagine there's a team out there looking for that.
You don't want to be that parent - the one who dresses his kid in a cloth sack when all the other kids are in Armani cloth sacks - especially in a time like ours, when materialism is not only rampant and ascendant but is fast becoming the only game in town.
I'm not a potato sack; I've never sat on my couch. If I'm home, I'm cleaning, feeding my dogs, doing stuff. Life is too precious to waste time.
In high school I had sex with girls quite a few times. They were straight women who I convinced to jump in the sack with me.
I remember thinking that a girdle was barbaric, and that never in a million years would I treat myself like a sleeping bag being shoved into a stuff sack. Never! Instead, I would run marathons and work out and be in perfect shape and reject the tyranny of the girdle forever.
I might do 'X Factor' next year. It's looking good that I won't get the sack at Christmas.
We were playing a fair, and a few people were handing me stuffed animals and flowers, but one person handed me a paper sack. So I took all the stuff back to the bus. I put the sack in my lap and opened it, and a live iguana jumped out of the sack and onto my shirt. I screamed like a little girl!
